TWEAK OF THE THUMB

In the warmer months the lawns are to be cut at least once every ten days and maybe even more during the peak season, depending on the rain. Any stray grass cuttings (the rules of employment stipulate) that are not caught by the catcher are to be carefully raked and properly disposed of atop the compost heap, which needs to be turned through at least once a week with a pitchfork. And it's important never to forget to go back and trim the lawn edges and afterwards use the leaf blower to blow all the paths clear again. Until seeing it for myself in the shed, I never realized a leaf blower was an actual machine, nor a lawn edger for that matter, either. Up till now they would have sounded like some unfortunate, ill paid position a desperate father might have to undertake most weekends to earn enough to sufficiently feed his brood of eight. As for what Mrs Shearer called a whipper-snipper, a process of elimination helps identify that particular contraption. Fortunately the manuals for each device are neatly piled in an oil stained wooden box, beside a large enough collection of chemicals that look as if they could do serious damage to a herd of elephants.